bbkeaterpan:

I hope you all go to a concert and your fav looks straight into your eyes and smiles

(via dowgge)


debilitati0n:

bettervillains:

life-at-taco-bell:

You would think that teenagers would be the rudest customers when really it’s mostly old, middle-aged people. 

  

The elderly are either adorable or the wrinkly reincarnation of Satan there is no in between

(via mumfordy)


unclefather:

i love that kids don’t understand the concept of money. i heard a kid at walmart today grab a bag of beef jerky and say “i’m just going to have this” and when his mom said “you can’t just take that” he said “who is going to stop me” 

(via everyonetells)


aresnakesreal:

like imagine if you’d never seen a dog and you saw a saint bernard and you were like, what’s that and then someone was like, thats a dog. and then you saw a chihuahua and you were like ok whats that and they were like, that’s a dog. wouldn’t you feel lied to? wouldn’t you sense that something was amiss

(via everyonetells)


gavinopricey:

You wake up in the middle of surgery and a couple of asshole doctors are trying to flip a plastic spoon right above your open chest cavity.

(via everyonetells)




Daily Show correspondent Michael Che tries to find a safe place to report from.

(via everyonetells)


I’m with you. No matter what else you have in your head I’m with you and I love you.
Ernest Hemingway (via highrapunzel)

(via everyonetells)


chroniclesofachemist:

theskaldspeaks:

qualitymarvel:

if i had to choose between DNA and RNA, i would choose RNA because it has U in it

YOU FUCKER

9/10 very close to being the worst science pun ever.

(via everyonetells)


panicacidide:

Apparently it’s not socially acceptable for a man to invite another man out just for coffee or to go out for a meal, in case it’s perceived as a date. Like it’s fine if you wanna go to the pub and drink beer and have a chat but make it non-alcoholic and suddenly you’re not straight anymore? You can go to the cinema together but ONLY if it’s an action movie. You guys can’t even just go shopping with each other. Oh masculinity, so fragile, so strange. 

(via dowgge)


overtheunderpass:

there’s this car where i’m from, known pretty well by people as “the duck car” and i finally saw it and it beats every celebrity sighting 

image

image

(via dowgge)


Making a mistake in a performance, but pretending like nothing happened


humansofnewyork:

"I want to be an engineer.""What advice would you give other engineers?""If you build a house that collapses, you’re going to get arrested. So you need to keep using the pendulum to make sure that everything is straight. Also, your cement mix has to be strong. You also need to be careful with the builders that you hire, or they will steal the cement from you.”"What sort of building would you build?""A factory that makes new books, so that everyone can have new books for school. All of my books are old and have writing in them."(Entebbe, Uganda)

humansofnewyork:

"I want to be an engineer."
"What advice would you give other engineers?"
"If you build a house that collapses, you’re going to get arrested. So you need to keep using the pendulum to make sure that everything is straight. Also, your cement mix has to be strong. You also need to be careful with the builders that you hire, or they will steal the cement from you.”
"What sort of building would you build?"
"A factory that makes new books, so that everyone can have new books for school. All of my books are old and have writing in them."

(Entebbe, Uganda)

(via dowgge)